Monday, July 30, 2012

Lesson 3: What am I Getting Myself Into?

If you have made it to this step, it must mean you have met a man that meets the requirements of the last couple of posts. Congratulations, you have done NOTHING. Just kidding of course, but I can tell you that meeting a nerd is not the hardest part. Starting a new relationship with one is much harder and more confusing. There are a few things you should know and expect before you jump in on your first "real" date (this topic could, and probably will, have it's own post. Nerds have a way of blurring the definition of a "date"). First of all, let's discuss what you can do to prepare.

  1. Become familiar with the culture if you aren't already.
    • I'm not asking you to change who you are. If you aren't into that kind of stuff, fine, but you should still familiarize yourself with some of his interests. How will you know what his interests are if you don't know him? A rule of thumb with geeky guys: they are all into the same thing. Cult TV shows, sci-fi movies and video games. With the exception of  few on this list, these are the TV shows I'm talking about . As for movies, you might be surprised how few comic book-based movies are at the top of a nerd guy's list (and even fewer movies based on video games). Nerdy guys like movies that are quick, witty, fast paced and smart. Remember, these guys are on computers for most of their lives, and their brains just work faster. They don't have time or patience to watch The Vow.  As for video games, every guy likes a different genre. Becoming familiar with the lingo is important (look for a lesson on lingo in my next post).
  2. Your looks won't get you far.
    • Caking on unnatural makeup, sliding into your Spanx and spending 2 hours on your hair is not only a pain in the ass, it is utterly pointless if you are going on a date with a nerd. They notice what is coming out of your mouth and, more often than not, they like a more natural look. Pick an outfit that accentuates your natural figure and don't add any clothing items that would be awkward to have a guy come in contact with on accident. The other thing about nerds....I want to be sensitive here...they want to have sex with you yesterday. If you go on a date and it goes well, expect to at the least be making out and at the most be getting down and dirty. Do you really want a guy to feel your shapewear? Gross.
  3. Expect "strange" behavior.
    • If you have been on a lot of dates, you probably know the drill. Neither one of you gives away too much info, you don't discuss the future, and you wait by the damn phone for them to call or text you after the date. Nuts to that. A geek will tell you right off the bat what his plans are and how you would fit into them. If he wants to see you again, he will tell you. If he wants to make out, he will ask if he can. He won't play games with you. Be prepared for honesty...sometimes BRUTAL honesty. If he is not interested in a future with you, he is probably going to tell you in those exact words. He will tell you if you are being a twat. Maybe you are. Maybe you should knock it off. 
My next post will teach you some terms that nerd use frequently IRL for all you n00bs. Oh, and if you have a moment, visit my friend Tiffany's blog. She has experienced nerd love for herself! 

Next Lesson: What the hell did you just say?

Monday, July 23, 2012

Lesson 2: Where Do I Find a Nerd When I am Ready?

So you are ready for love? Good. Now I will let you know all of the different ways and places you can meet an amazing geek. They range from super easy to 1337 level (don't worry, there will be a lesson coming up about lingo). As I said in a previous post, the "traditional" meet ups like bars are not as useful when you are hunting nerds. They are often very shy in venues like that. Here are some alternatives:

  1. Ask your friends
    • Chances are your friends know at least one guy who is a techie (they probably call him when they can't figure out why their screen saver isn't working). The reason you weren't ever told about this guy is because your friend thought you were too shallow, and my dear, she was right. But you have turned over a new leaf! Let your bestie know you are now open to all types of guys.
  2. Online dating
    • Don't you make that face, you said you were open to change. Many nerds have turned to internet dating for many reasons. First of all, they are comfortable behind a computer. They run the internet, so they feel in total control. It also helps them weed out women who they know right away wouldn't be good matches (girls who use the phrase "I'm not like other girls"). If you are looking for a good site to join, try okcupid.com. The service is free and they don't have ridiculous qualifications to join like some of the pay sites. I can personally vouch for okcupid...I met my fiance there.
  3. Work
    • Every company has an IT department. Make friends with them by not calling them with stupid fucking questions about your computer. That is what Google is for. There is a risk in dating a guy who work in IT at your company, though. He knows how many hours a day you are on Pinterest.
  4. MMO's or other online games
    •  Now we are talking! MMO stands for Massively Multiplayer Online. It refers to games like World of Warcraft (WoW), Everquest, and Star Wars the Old Republic (SWTOR). Playing these games directly connects you with MILLIONS of nerds, half of which are men and a fourth of which are around your age. Get a decent computer (there are a bunch of nerds that would love to help you with that) and get one of these games. They are fun and very social, despite what you may have heard about losers in their parent's basements.
  5. Conventions
    • If you really want to move forward, cons are another way to go. San Diego Comic-Con, for example, has transformed from a few hundred die-hard comic book fans to what it is today: a place where celebrities and geeks mingle together, and the "next big thing" in entertainment is unveiled. You will see guys in costumes you don't understand. Ask one of them to explain their costume to you and for help to get a good place in line at a panel.
Get yourself out there and take a chance on finding the love of your life!

Next Lesson: What will my date be like?